{"title":"House Of Smoke And Regret","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cimg src=\"https:\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0965\/3361\/0843\/files\/House-of-smoke-and-regret.jpg?v=1781039924\" alt=\"\"\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"house-of-smoke-and-regret-apron","title":"House of smoke and regret - Apron","description":"\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eA premium heavyweight apron from the domestic archives of Mr Freddie Mercury (the feline).\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePrinted in small batches on heavyweight cotton (240gsm 100% cotton) with a minimalist finish intended for:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-spread=\"false\"\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cspan\u003ebarbecue supervision\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cspan\u003esmoke-related incidents\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cspan\u003ekitchen malfeasance\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cspan\u003eemotionally charged indoor and outdoor cooking\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cspan\u003estanding beside food stuffs with misplaced confidence and a drink in hand\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eEach design features one of Freddie’s increasingly concerned observations on fire, perseverance, and the slow psychological erosion caused by patio dining.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIncludes full front coverage for moments of culinary adversity.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Freddie \u0026 the Bag","offers":[{"title":"I soldier on.","offer_id":53343586746715,"sku":null,"price":22.0,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"An amuse-bouche of revenge.","offer_id":53343663915355,"sku":null,"price":22.0,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"House of smoke and regret.","offer_id":53343586779483,"sku":null,"price":22.0,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Senior Tin Opener.","offer_id":53343586812251,"sku":null,"price":22.0,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"The smoke alarm is merely applauding.","offer_id":53343586845019,"sku":null,"price":22.0,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Feline Support Staff.","offer_id":53343586877787,"sku":null,"price":22.0,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Surviving out of spite.","offer_id":53343586910555,"sku":null,"price":22.0,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"I follow recipes emotionally.","offer_id":53343586976091,"sku":null,"price":22.0,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Official Catering Partner Of Regret.","offer_id":53343663948123,"sku":null,"price":22.0,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"I have rather critically misunderstood the assignment.","offer_id":53343663980891,"sku":null,"price":22.0,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0965\/3361\/0843\/files\/I_soldier_on_ed751a20-7686-4aa7-8177-a69ca98d7594.png?v=1780956864"},{"product_id":"house-of-smoke-and-regret-the-dish-towel","title":"House Of Smoke And Regret - The Tea Towel (dish towel).","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eOfficial Tea Towel of Poor Decisions. \u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThe advanced dish that seemed sensible from the child's cookbook. The experimental seasoning. The pan left unattended during a perfectly avoidable conversation.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis tea towel stands witness to all of it and silently judges you. \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eMade from 100% cotton and designed for drying dishes, absorbing minor catastrophes and preserving what remains of your dignity following The Crème Brûlée Incident.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFor international customers: yes, this is what the British call a dish towel. No, it is not used for tea. To the best of my knowledge, no tea towel has met a cup of tea professionally \u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003esince a tea cosy successfully unionised the profession.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePart of the House of Smoke \u0026amp; Regret collection.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWashable. Forgiving. Unlike certain dinner guests.\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":" Freddie \u0026 the Bag","offers":[{"title":"An amuse-bouche of regret","offer_id":53357452788059,"sku":null,"price":12.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Feline Support staff","offer_id":53357452820827,"sku":null,"price":12.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"First Breakfast","offer_id":53357452853595,"sku":null,"price":12.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"House of smoke and regret","offer_id":53357452886363,"sku":null,"price":12.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"I soldier on","offer_id":53357452919131,"sku":null,"price":12.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Justice wears whiskers","offer_id":53357452951899,"sku":null,"price":12.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Official Catering Partner Of Regret","offer_id":53357452984667,"sku":null,"price":12.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Senior Tin Opener","offer_id":53357453017435,"sku":null,"price":12.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0965\/3361\/0843\/files\/An_amuse-bouche.png?v=1781125146"},{"product_id":"house-of-smoke-and-regret-the-tote-bag","title":"House Of Smoke And Regret - The Tote Bag.","description":"\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eOfficial Tote Bag of Unresolved Matters.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eThe emergency snack. The unsigned threats in letter form. The three items from the shop that became eleven and a leaky Greek yoghurt. The evidence.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eThis bag carries all of it without complaint, without judgement, and without once asking why there is a receipt from 2019 at the bottom.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eMade from 100% organic cotton. Designed for carrying things, absorbing minor catastrophes, and preserving what remains of your dignity when the self-checkout requires assistance for the fourth time.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003ePart of the House Of Smoke and Regret collection. \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eReusable. Reliable. Unlike certain members of staff.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":" Freddie \u0026 the Bag","offers":[{"title":"Contents: Spite and snacks.","offer_id":53357514883419,"sku":null,"price":12.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Feline Support Staff.","offer_id":53357514916187,"sku":null,"price":12.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"I soldier on.","offer_id":53357514948955,"sku":null,"price":12.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Justice wears whiskers.","offer_id":53357514981723,"sku":null,"price":12.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Packed in haste.","offer_id":53357515014491,"sku":null,"price":12.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Please be kind to my human staff.","offer_id":53357515047259,"sku":null,"price":12.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Senior Tin Opener.","offer_id":53357515080027,"sku":null,"price":12.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Contents: Snacks and strongly worded letters","offer_id":53357515112795,"sku":null,"price":12.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0965\/3361\/0843\/files\/Contents_sptite.png?v=1781126441"}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0965\/3361\/0843\/collections\/House-of-smoke-and-regret.jpg?v=1781039932","url":"https:\/\/freddieandthebag.com\/collections\/house-of-smoke-and-regret.oembed","provider":" Freddie \u0026 the Bag","version":"1.0","type":"link"}